For me, coffee and productivity go hand in hand. On the rare days that I allow myself to drink it, I seem to accomplish everything. Fueled by a mere twelve ounces of this mysterious, mercurial nectar, I go from 6am workouts to rehearsals to work to house-cleaning to laundry to practicing to cooking to more rehearsals without so much as a heavy-lidded eye or drowsy head nod. But because of its numerous adverse effects on me, I seldom partake of the stuff. So according to the transitive property, productivity and I very much do not go hand in hand. It is a misfortune that distresses me greatly.